freedom is now!

in the p-sling, waiting to go outside


channeling robert mapplethorpe

delightful, scrumptious thighs

like me, his hair is curly when wet


this week has been so much better than the previous 5. thank you for all of your comments, i know every day is going to bring its own share of challenges and rewards, but i'm finally starting to feel that things are improving.

leon slept 4 hours twice this week, which was somewhat unnerving (but great). because i produce so much milk, i usually have to pump at least once every couple of days. otherwise, poor leon gets more than he can handle, and i'm a hormonal trainwreck. i'm hoping things will start settling down soon, but i'm grateful that i don't have to worry about not producing enough milk.

also, this week leon and i ventured outside twice! once in the p-sling, which he is starting to love. my shoulder isn't as happy, but i'm going to my local babywearing group in two weeks for advice. we also finally took the stroller out for a walk to school. i wanted to attend part of a conference, so matthew and i took turns watching leon. he slept pretty much the whole time, even when i kept running into trash cans (trash day...) he didn't seem to mind at all.

next thursday is my la leche league meeting, which will hopefully give me the support i need. leon never eats for longer than 15 minutes. i can't tell if he's just a super efficient eater or what, but he's certainly putting on the pounds without any problem. the main thing is, i think he has trouble latching on. i'm not sure if he's tongue-tied, but that could be one reason for the short, frequent feeding sessions. per catherine's suggestion, i've been feeding on the same side twice when they last for less than 5 minutes, but this is hard to do without serious engorgement issues. so, back to the pump i go.

i'm still pretty frustrated that i can't get any of my own work done. i've started back up on my adviser's book illustration project (yay for getting paid), but my chapters are sitting neglected. i know i should slow down and enjoy these early months with leon. he's growing so quickly, and there are so many emotions and thoughts running through my head that it seems silly to add extra stress. i'm already nostalgic for my scrawny little newborn, but i'm also enjoying his new facial expressions (smiles) and sounds (almost baby-like rather than dinosaur-like). it is so hard to juggle my desire to keep working on my dissertation with wanting to nap all day long next to his warm heavy weight, jerky movements, and pinchable chubby thighs.

six weeks today, and spring has yet to arrive. we are looking forward to sitting outside and sipping morrocan mint tea.