Wednesday, April 14, 2010
sometimes we let him cry, sometimes we don't. it depends on the cry and the number of yawns that intersperse the cries. but in general, our schedule looks like this:
i crawl into his toddler bed (the gulliver crib converted), nurse him for a few minutes, and then lay next to him until he falls asleep.
i nurse him again
more insistent cries mean that nursing to sleep won't work. i take him onto the futon on the ground and we fall asleep.
i've tried letting him cry at 3 am, but that has only led to hourly wakings. i'm too exhausted to go back and forth between rooms.
his morning nap usually happens around 11am, in the stroller. for some reason he has been fighting the bed for the past two weeks. the weather is nice, so we walk and walk.
the afternoon nap is on the way out. sometimes it happens at 3, but usually he pushes it back to 4 or even 5. this one happens either in the stroller or on a drive.
he nurses twice in the morning, twice in the afternoon. and nights are an open bar, per usual.
am i tired? yes. do i function? more or less.
we have a part-time babysitter (9 hours a week, m-w). i dash off to starbucks, which is the nearest coffee shop, and write as much as i can for 2.5 hours. usually i can produce 2-3 pages of something. the babysitter has made all the difference in the world. i resent leon less during our time together because i have those 9 hours reserved for work. it was so hard staying focused on him when half of me was fretting about my stalled dissertation. it's slowly starting back up again, but i know that i'm going to have force myself to work at nights. until now i've refused to do this because of sleep deprivation and leon's inability to sit still. things are getting better. he loves the playground and can spend an hour sitting in the sandbox by himself. i've managed to edit a few pages with one eye on him.
it's taken a long time, but it's getting better. his phone conversations are getting more and more hilarious, and i don't know whether to laugh or cry when he throws a tantrum. that lower lip gets me every time.